Dapper Clown Posse: EXCLUSIVE Interview!
Hey guys, thanks for giving us the exclusive
First of all, run us through your names, so fans can get their tattoos done accurately.
From left to right: (Click for larger version)
El Monto Suavé, bass. Da Quincy, vocal. Mr Mingles, Lead vocal. Sir Stares-A-Lot, Keyboards. Slicky Blingers, Skiffle board. David Dickensons Brother, Drums.
How do you manage to stay so Dapper?
For some people (mainly us) it comes naturally. You clearly lack that natural ability.
That was quite rude, but I shall continue anyway...
You're in a lift, someone drops an air biscuit, what do you do?
Look suave and then fall over a lot while Slicky rides around on a tiny jewel encrusted bike. Possibly David Dickensons Brother will drop some fat beats.
Tell us how you got into the music industry.
Sir Stares-A-Lot was once friendly with Sparks Keyboard player (Hitler or someone). knowing someone from Sparks really goes a long way in this business.
How many fingers am I holding up?
They're fingers? I thought you were holding a bunch of frankfurters in your fist.
Wrong, guess again:
3. Don't test a Clown boy.
If a clown falls down in the street, and there is nobody there to see it, does he get his knob out?
No. Why would he put ever put his chap away in the first place? Have you Done any research for this interview at all? I'm getting the urge to pop a cap in your arse sir.
After the success of "Hats for Clowns" have you found that people treat you differently?
Sure. Now we can aford to buy real dapper threads we get a lot more attention from the Bearded Ladies and some rather unwanted attention from that rather camp Ring Master (Hmmmmm. Even his name is camp.).
I hear you guys are keen sportsmen, which sport is your favourite and why?
Ah a good question at last. We all like a rousing game of pocket billiards. El Monto is seeded in the top 20 worldwide.
Lets pretend, if you will, that the Dapper Clown Posse are in a thumb-war deathmatch versus The Insane Clown Posse, who is going to win and who is going to die?
They're not real clowns you know. With that information under your belt I'd say We'd win and The Pope is probably going to die.
Tea or Coffee?
Tea. Coffee is an uncouth beverage.
Coke or Pepsi?
Coca Cola is far more refined than Pepsi. No clown who is also dapper would ever be seen drinking Pepsi.
Starsky or Hutch?
Hutch. Starsky looked a bit council estate for my tastes.
What is 3 + 14?
The ratio of crust to shaving foam in a throwing pie.
MacGuyver or the A-Team?
The bands rather split on this. We'll have to say we love both equally (though I think Hanibal would make an excellent clown).
You're trapped in a cupboard, your hands are tied behind your back, there is a blindfold covering your eyes, and you can feel water slowly rising up your leg. What do you do?
By this time, the Posse were getting pretty restless. Mr Mingles shouted "BLING BLING, BABY!" and 2 ladies escorted him, and the band out to the limo, I was able to get this picture before they left: