I'm not much good at this sort of thing but todays attacks in London are down right evil. I think it's safe to say that all of us involved with the running of this site want to say we are thinking of anyone caught up in the tragedy be it directly or though friends and especially to anyone who has lost a loved one.
It's weird being this close to something like this but it was also amazing to see how well the emergency services managed. A huge thank you to them as well. It's a miracle that more people weren't killed something which we should all be grateful for.
I hope that our leaders don't chose to use this attack as an excuse to rush through draconian laws or the utter waste of money and resources that is the ID card fiasco when it's clear that they would have done nothing to stop this happening.
On a lighter note anyone in the UK who wants to cheer up a Weebl please vote out Maxwell this friday. it's not free for sure but you can text MAXWELL to 64404 (apparently it's 35p plus standard network charges). I really just cannot stand the man.
 He's gone!!! huzzahs all round.
Welcome one and all to the first part in an occasional series detailing one man's failure to get Britain's top comedians to tell any of his jokes.
Jimmy Carr would not tell these gags. Trust me – it’s a cast-iron 100% solid fact he wouldn’t; in fact, he had the option to do so, and he most definitely didn’t tell a single one of them.
A report published last year by the Australian tourist board suggests that only 40% of visitors ever leave Australia alive. 5% are backpackers abducted by violent but lovable men in "utes", 5% just stay permanently in the country because the laid-back atmosphere makes them far too lazy to get on the plane home. This, of course, leaves a massive 50% of travellers who are killed by wildlife. I don't have any actual figures on the specific amount of casualties, but an arbitrary number I just made up suggests that as many as 8,000,000 tourists are killed each year by Australian fauna. We can't have this.
Any level-headed human with the capacity for reasoned thought would automatically see that this motley selection of shoddily-made US splatter, incomprehensible Italian hippy-crap monster movies, cheap-jack cannibal rubber-chomping gut-fests and nasty Nazi nork-flicks were as genuinely corrupting to public morals as Athena posters soaked in milk. Hell, even the most emotionally immature Iron Maiden devotee would get real bored, real fast, once the thrill of patently fake innards and the odd badly-shaved foreign front bum had worn off. But to a tabloid journalist or an uptight old harridan, these silly, ugly little shockers were the pre-AIDS harbinger of encroaching Armageddon – so come, let us journey back to the halcyon days of 1982, and have a butchers’ at…
THE A-Z OF VIDEO NASTIES
(This article isn't for kids. Seriously.)
It is a Cat Face Halloween special. Yes.
Steeds will be beheld. Verily.
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