Croissants in your pants

• Posted by Bob
• Category: News
• 

 

Lo

Update!! New Game New Game oh my!

This game is what some people would call awesome. It combine two of everyone most favourite things. Crabs and Battling! When you're done playing it come back and read the e-mails I got sent.

CLICKY

I been informed by a whispering seagull that the next episode of Catface is coming soon. I not sure if you care but if you don't then why are you reading this anyway? You some sort of internet weirdo? Hehe, me too. Lets chat.

EMAILS TIME! (Come and read what madness I have been sent)

Lo Bob, I have exciting news to share with you!
 
Last night, I had a vision. A vision of a game that you will make in the future. It goes like this. You are a handsome man, and you are getting married to your beautiful wife today. But your beautiful wife has a problem: the only way that she can be transported is by removing her head from her body (which subsequently turns into a watermelon), and dribbling it to the destination. Her body can take the car, or something. I don't know. You can improvise with that part.
 
So, you need to dribble your wife's watermelon head all the way from her house, through the streets and park, to the church. But it's not as easy as it sounds. The evil bader and his pumpkin-headed scarecrow sidekick will stop at nothing to destroy your beautiful wife's lovely head. So they will give chase, and if you drop the head, they will try to jump on it! Game over.
 
I know. It is a vision of the future. It will win gaming Baftas. I would make it myself, but the vision said that you were to make it. So I'm leaving it in your hands. I wish you all the success and money in the world.
 
Thank you,
 
Espy

This terrifying! A vision of me with a melonheaded bride :( I not sure that this game would be fun but I admire the use of pumpkin v watermelon. Trouble is, pumpkin would always win because it far superior. For that reason, Espy, I'm out.

Hello from Nebraska!
 
You know, when I sit in my vast cornfields and ponder the meanings of the intarwebz, I always know that out there, somewhere, is Bob. And I keep that in mind as I hop on my tractor and plow some crop circles for a few hours.
 
So thank you, Bob, for giving me the strength I need to do what must be done!
 
Keep up the wonderful work!
 
-Liz

Lo Liz! How you managed to grow corn in all that snow? I'm glad I give you strength but I think you are mistaken about the crop circles. There is no way a simple tractor could produce such a thing! They are obviously the work of youfos.

Dear Bob,
Did you know that peeling sellotape off the roll causes the tape to emit light? It's true, this phenomena is best enjoyed in the dark and has the potential to entertain for as long as you have tape to peel. If you do it in a vacuum, it will emit x-rays!

Regards,
Alex

Lo Alex. I did know but thank you for trying to help! I am keen amateur scientist. Why you think I was covered in tape anyway? I am working on a new device to fool airport scanners so I can smuggle cutlery onboard planes thus allowing me to eat my meal more efficiently. Soon as I work out how to hold it, that is.